Dishonesty, disconnection and mumbo-jumbo, a look at the leaflets pouring through our letter-boxes
If you live in Sidcup, Bexley or surrounding areas you'll probably have had loads of leaflets stuffed through your letter box about the the forthcoming by-election. I know I have, and I'm as disturbed by much of what's been written on them, as well as amused.
Readers of my previous blogs will know that I have been particularly critical of the Tories in the constituency. Back in 2010 they promised to save the A&E and maternity units at Queen Mary's in return for our votes, with puffing, sweating Tories wandering around Sidcup with a cardboard cut-out of Gordon Brown wielding a big pair of scissors.
Changing the dates...
The Conservatives not only let those departments close after the election, they told the News Shopper (sadly just about our only local media) to remove any comments reminding people of that promise (it all too readily agreed to do this, I spoke to the editor), they then claimed it was the NHS that shut it down once a Tory-led government coalition was in place (the NHS they run...) and in their 2015 their Sidcup & Old Bexley election material they changed the date of the closure to before the 2010 election (I made them correct that on the website but written deliberately misleading material would have already been delivered). You can read about that here and see actual material from local Tories.
I have challenged Louie French to debate this openly on neighbourly forum NextDoor or Twitter but he hasn't responded at all. Nothing. Whilst broadcasting platitudes on social media about what should be done, he never responds.
The Tories were right when they said that the loss of our hospital departments would have devastating consequences, with longer trips to A&E and maternity. The Tory Assembly Member wrote a long road-rage piece about his wife nearly having an accident on the A2 and that had she actually have had an accident, Gordon Brown would be responsible for her certain death, had there actually been an accident. We're all still living with real accidents and emergencies, without an A&E. It's as important then as it was now.
The East Wickham Godfather
Like a protective godfather, Cllr Steven Hall answered on Louie's behalf on NextDoor as Louie was still wandering about, hoping no-one would speak to him, hiding behind god-uncles and aunts like Rishi Sunak, Johnson and, God forbid, Liz Truss who somehow managed to work a satnav to get here. Priti Patel also turned up in Sidcup High Street, presumably looking for refugees and discarded dinghies outside Waitrose that she could point out to wavering hard-right Tories, Heritage Party, UKIP and BNP voters now that her family was in and she'd pulled up the drawbridge.
Chucked out of NextDoor
It would be nice to keep debating with Steven. However, 'someone' reported me to NextDoor for not using my real name so my account was disabled. This is an echo to the News Shopper censorship. By the way, I use my writing name extensively for my books and other writing, in the same way that Reg Dwight and Harry Webb use theirs for their work, not that I'm in their league. In fact I use it in a similar way to Tory 'grandee' Grant Shapps, who went under the name of Mr Green for some time, whilst denying that he was Mr Green, in order to hide his second (or third?) job. Shapps threatened anyone exposing this with libel. But he was finally caught out as like so many of his colleagues, he ain't the sharpest tool in the box.
Randall & Hopkirk
Being selected for the Conservatives in Sidcup & Old Bexley is better than winning the lottery. You get over £80k every year and enough expenses for tax-payers to pay your son a part-time salary for three years when he was in fact studying full-time at university. That was the previous incumbent before Mr Brokenshire, Derek Conway. It's a job for life, until you get caught. Few in the constituency appear to think, "Hang on a minute, what are we getting for our money?" They just vote the same way every time.
As well as a writer I'm a PR and public affairs person, which means I spend much of my time meeting and talking with Lords, Ladies, MPs and Ministers, trying to get them to amend laws and generally do the right thing on behalf of charities and businesses. Some of them I really rate and like, and I have socialised with them out of choice, from nearly all parties. But I'm often reminded of when I did my first MP meet with the MD of a cable TV company. When we left, the MD said: "I wouldn't give him a Level 1," meaning the lowest management role in his business.
And he was right. Amongst the awful MPs, the mad, the bad and the useless, are those whom the local association has chosen because they have no ideas of their own and no plans, and can be easily influenced. And I'm worried that's what's happened here. This might be completely unfair, but Louie is completely invisible. It's like a political Randall & Hopkirk (younger people look that up on Google) but where only other Conservatives can see Louie.
Most people don't vote for a person, they vote for a party, so the Conservatives in Old Bexley & Sidcup could have pulled Prince Andrew out of hiding and he'd have got in. The MP expenses would be handy for the legal fees.
Propaganda leaflets
Let's have a look at what's being shoved through our boxes, so to speak.
Christian People's Alliance
Conservative
To make up for his lack of presence Louie's 'leaflet' is massive. You know what they say about politicians with a massive leaflet, fnaar, fnaar?! Actually I don't know but it is gargantuan. It says 'More and more local residents are backing Louie French'. Now when I write for people I must include the source for any claim I make. I can see none here. Johnson is saying that Louie is a 'terrific local candidate'. I think we all know that if you asked Johnson five minutes after meeting Louie the name of the candidate he'd only be able to answer "Peppa Pig?"
But look at this! Lovely clean-cut Conor pictured as one of the 'local residents' is actually a Conservative Party worker and Parliamentary assistant to Tracey Crouch MP. That's not declared anywhere on the leaflet. It seems like Louie has at least managed to convince a massive Tory to vote Tory in the by-election, nice one Louie!
The rest of the leaflet is platitudes and the usual old tosh that will never happen and our new local hero, when he becomes MP, will ignore any questions on it or say that providing more police or better education never actually meant providing more police or better education.
Particularly galling is the railways, it always features, our rail services are so poor that prospective MPs always hang about stations like train number enthusiasts, promising to put a firework up the railway bosses' backsides. However, post-election they're handing out awards to staff or sympathising with SouthEastern's MD over difficult weather conditions. Constituents will just be told: "I don't run the railways."
And, of course, our hospital features. The NHS will be adding and taking away facilities, you can expect the new MP to take credit for any new facilities, though they'll have had nothing to do with them. And if you ask about facilities that we were promised would remain, then you're a lone nutter.
Heritage Party
Huge pic of the candidate David Kurten with a big ol' union flag behind him. Now I know Kurten is local because I have often been denied the seat next to him on the train because he's huge and very, very sweaty. David is very keen on barring immigrants, a) because unlike persuading the UK's corporates to pay some bloody tax, it's much more sexy to go on about immigrants, who pay more on average in tax than us lot. And b), of, course there'd be even less room for him on the trains. Kurten's heritage is partly Jamaican, so he too is pulling up the drawbridge (in return for votes).
David is also keen on the important issues that really affect each and every one of us, such as not allowing Pride flags on public buildings.
Labour
Nothing through the door yet. At all. Presumably party funds not up to it.
LibDems
What do you if you can't decide if you're Labour or Tory? Vote LibDem! Nice pic of Simone on the front, looking a bit stern, by Five Arches. Main messages are that Simone is local, experienced and demands better. Some stuff about Tory sleaze on the back, but tell us something we didn't know Carol.
Rejoin the EU
I actually met the candidate outside Sidcup station, the sort of spot Louie would shudder at unless he's trying to get a train up to his financial services job, debating with people. Quite straightforward and apart from the picture that makes the candidate look like Alan B'Stard from The New Statesman, the leaflet is quite informative. It's even got a quiz! Though I suspect it wouldn't go down that well in the Tailor's Chalk pub quiz.
Ukip
Same, same old. Foreign aid, immigrants, 'woke', 'cancel culture' (apart from cancelling immigrants), 'erosion of British history' by a bunch of people who want to do nothing more than erode British history. In the same point wants women protected from rape (only a Ukip candidate needs to tell potential voters that) and a 'forum to combat social media' (put it on Facebook?)
The candidate, John Poynton, is a management consultant. These are slightly less trustworthy than estate agents. Of course Ukip takes pains to communicate that John is definitely not a racist by pointing out that he worked in Nigeria and recruited people from 'many different backgrounds'. Though I suspect that his choice was fairly limited there. Anyway, he's back with us now, unless he plans to run the constituency from Lagos.
Worth pointing out that John's boss is now Neil Hamilton, he of the brown envelopes, cash for questions episode. Nice to see that people can rise to the top even after they have reformed many times over.
The future's the same as just now...
So, there you have it. Anything from dinosaur deniers, climate-change deniers, sweaty blokes on trains and a candidate who'll win anyway who's having to pretend he's converted a party worker to vote for the party he's chosen to work for.
The Tories will win in Old Bexley & Sidcup 'because that's how my mum and dad voted', Jeremy Corbyn, Diane Abbott, and we'll have another few years of zero campaigns on anything at all to help the constituency until the next election.
So why not give them a scare this time? If you are a Conservative your values are about hard work. So why is it ok to hand someone an assured salary without a single KPI attached to it because they know that they'll have your support no matter what?
